I can't believe I just pulled another all-nighter to make trip plans for Hong Kong while I am still in Japan!

I had an adult eikaiwa group this morning, all I could talk about was poaching and crabbing and kayak-camping. My tongue is still in Japan; but my mind is already somewhere in the big blue sea.

I was hoping to dock a kayak in DB so I can regularly put in two-days circumnavigation of Lantau drills, and still have a soft bed to sleep in once I finish. But as I start plotting around on Google Earth, I begin to appreciate how good Fred's location is. I'm half a day away from Tung Peng Chau, Double Havens, and maybe even Long Ke Wan. Which means, when I am in shape again, I can do regular day trips to any of these places. Double Haven holds such great memories for me though, I wouldn't mind doing some leisurely camping trips there either. (Like three or four days with only 30Km of travelling!)

I'm still feeling rather nostalgic about the west side of Hong Kong, especially around Lamma, Lantau, and even the airport, but still, this is a great chance for me to get to know Sai Kung better. I was reluctant to base my kayaking activities there before, mostly because of my many disastrous landings during my circumnavigate-HKSAR trip. But once I know the area better, once I know where are the landing sites, once I get to explore the area in broad daylight, it can't be any worse than, say, Lantau or Lamma.

Better yet, Fred's and Disco Bay are only 76Km away. So if I feel particularly masochistic, I could possibly cover the distance in two days. To avoid any more disastrous landing and night-paddling though, I prefer to give myself three days. Still, it's quite a reasonable distance and it's probably a good route to use both for explorations and for long distance drills. Once I am familiar enough with the areas, I should be able to add detours like a quick visit to the Ninepins group, Waglan, etc.

As I mull over route plans and such, these emotions came to me strong and loud:

1) Longing. I miss going out to sea.

2) Fear. An irrational fear of the sunset. An irrational fear of the dark. It's like I have regressed back to being a small child, completely unexperienced in the camping craft. The darkness of the nature grew on me when I was camping in the Algonquins as a teenager; but now, the fear of the it is amplified 10 folds, to the point where I start to panic when the trip route distance accumulates to 45Km or so. I start wondering, "would it be past 6pm by that time? Would it be too late to start looking for landing sites?"

3) Dread. The dread of heading out again after lunch break. I remember lying around on warm sand around noon, after a modest lunch. My body tired and punished beyond what is humane, and I knew I need to move on, so I got up and felt how shaky my legs were; dragged myself back to the edge of the water, unleashed my kayak, and dragged the heavy, half-filled-with water craft back into the water with great dismay. Sometimes I will fall on my knees in exasperation, regretting taking so long a lunch break such that the tide has ebbed too much, leaving me with a punishing distance to cover. And then I would feel ashamed of myself, "whose compassions are you appealing to? You're alone; there is nobody to help you do your work. So stop acting pathetic."

4) Contentment. Oh yes, lying on the warm sand with a full stomach, bathing in the warm sunlight, I've yet to experience greater pleasures.

5) Thrill. That excitement of riding the currents, with the waves pushing behind you and you catch it with your paddles in effortless but brisk strokes so that you travel so fast that you momentarily fear the loss of control. The speed multiplies with the fear to heighten every sense and you are excited to the point of being indecent...

6) Insanity. By the third day of a solo trip, I go gaga predictably. Like, I would talk to the clouds, making up stories as they transform. I would also hold conversations with my left paddle "Lisa," and my right paddle "Richard." And I thought I was an asocial loner! Ha!

So, this year, I should work on what I fear: either do more planned night-paddling in areas I know well and with little traffic; or avoid making any more emergency landings. I should also discipline myself to start looking for the nearest landing site by 1700. Also, to avoid feeling too punished, I shouldn't plan too many solo trips that are longer than 3 days. If I need to cover more distance than that, I should take a break in between, get a shower, hang out with family and friends, before I push on.